The Male Condom (I Must Compliment You)

You need an applaud

You need a loud laud

For your fine rubber sheath

That is pulled over the erect penis

You I need to congratulate

You I need to felicitate

For trapping all semen that the penis ejaculates

During sexual intercourse of loving mates

I never want to end

To extol and to commend

To salute and raise

To give credit and praise

To eulogize

And never to criticize

You for preventing semen

From reaching the uterus of all women